Have you noticed that Millennials have become much less annoying over the past year? It just suddenly feels like they have grown up and are less whiny. Why, just last week, I had conversations with both of my Millennials that I thoroughly enjoyed. They seemed mature and upbeat and drama-free, which is as it should be since they are 32 and 35. The Millennial era includes people born from 1981 to 1996, which means the oldest in that generation have already turned 40! Millennials are getting married, buying houses, having children and bitching about taxes. The next thing you know they will become Republicans.

It is possible that Millennials have not actually changed, but have simply been given a reprieve from their characterization as the whiniest cohort on the planet by Generation Z. Gen Z consists of kids born between 1997 and 2012, so the oldest members are becoming employed. That is, as long as the employer doesn’t require them to actually go to an office. Members of my generation learned how to turn on a computer as adults. Millennials can remember taking keyboarding classes in middle school because they couldn’t type. Gen Z-ers were born with their fingers on the keyboard, typing with their thumbs on Mom’s phone before they learned to talk. Have you ever been in a restaurant and seen a bunch of young people sitting around a table, all looking at their phones? That’s Gen Z. They are texting each other.

Some people describe Gen Z as like Millennials on steroids and, in some ways, that is true. The dreams and preferences of Millennials have evolved into objects of necessity for Gen Z-ers. And whose fault is that? Their parents’, of course. And there’s a simple reason why: Elf on the Shelf. Read on.

ELF ON the SHELF

Elf on the Shelf didn’t really get a lot of traction until about 2008, which was good for me because I don’t think I could have dealt with one more stressor before the holidays. I was in nursing school with two kids under the age of 5 and felt so overwhelmed that one year I bought a pre-decorated tree from the Junior League’s Festival of Trees and had it delivered to the house. I plugged it in and we were good to go. If you feel like judging me for that, you are just proving that you are not a member of Gen Z. A Gen Z-er would NEVER pre-decorated-tree-shame me. They would just text me, Good for you for taking care of your mental health, followed by a little smiling Christmas tree emoji.

If you have been living under a rock for the past 15 years and don’t know what Elf on the Shelf is, allow me to explain. Elf on the Shelf is a stuffed character that comes with a book telling the story of how the elf observes children and then flies back to the North Pole to report their activities to Santa. It’s yet another way parents have of trying to make their bratty children behave, if just for one month out of the year. In my generation, a warning that Santa was going to bring us nothing but coal was enough to keep us in tow. Today’s version requires a lot more action on the part of the parents.

According to the story, the elf flies from one place to another overnight. Kids wake up in the morning eager to find the elf which, of course, has actually been moved by the parent while they were sleeping. The lengths parents go to to enthrall their Gen Z-ers is documented on social media sites like Instagram and Pinterest and I think it is the reason why that generation has such a sense of entitlement. That and the fact that their parents raised them with the pronouncement of a daily affirmation to remind them how special they are. The only daily affirmation my generation received was a reminder of the starving children in Biafra if we didn’t finish everything on our plates. Shame in child rearing was very big in the 50’s and 60’s so, while boomers are hopelessly neurotic, we sure as hell clean our plates.

THE LIST

Rather than rename my list every year to reflect the changing needs of different generations, I have decided to just refer to it as THE LIST in the future. Kind of like how Dunkin Donuts became just “Dunkin” and Cher became, well, Cher. As always, I am doubling down on some of my previous recommendations, because many of them are still relevant for the new generation of adults, but also because it’s a lot easier than thinking of new stuff. Please pay attention as you read to make sure you can tell the difference between my recommendations and the ads that are sprinkled throughout the post. I do not control the content of the ads or where they appear - that’s all Google Adsense and it’s based on what they have harvested from your search history. So don’t blame me if ads for vibrators appear in the post. That’s all on you.

REUSABLE GROCERY BAGS

Loyal readers know that my annual list would not be complete without a recommendation of reusable grocery bags. (Brace yourself; I feel a rant coming on.) They made their first appearance in the 2019 Millennial Gift List then again in 2021, and I’m not going to take them off until I stop seeing people walk out of the store with 17 plastic bags containing 20 items that could have fit into a single reusable bag. I can carry a single bag containing $65 worth of groceries over my shoulder which makes me feel smug and superior as I leave the store ahead of a college-aged kid carrying a plastic bag containing a single bottle of Synergy Raw Kombucha. In 2023 my town is implementing a 5 cent plastic bag tax, but I’m not exactly sure how they are going to monitor plastic bag use in the self-checkout area. Will it be an honor system thing, like asking you “How many plastic bags did you use” at the end of your checkout session? Do you think the Self Checkout Police can handle yet another duty, besides entering the code for my mangoes without me asking or automatically entering my age as 80 when I press the Senior Citizen Discount button? Frankly, I doubt that a 5 cent bag tax will matter to a member of a generation that is happy to pay $5.35 for a Starbucks Venti Lactaid Caramel Frappuccino Steamed Upside Down with No Whip.

My personal favorite reusable bags are the ones that come with a little sack to put the bag in so that you can always have one on you. If the person receiving the gift looks at you like you have lost your mind for giving them such an odd gift you can simply remind them that they are saving the planet, because the end of the world is never far from a Gen Z-ers mind. Read on.

Baggu Reusable Bags, set of three - $42.00

ONLINE THERAPY SUBSCRIPTION

Gen Z has been described as “the loneliest generation,” and that is mostly attributed to the fact that they are connecting with people so much through social media that they don’t have time to engage with others in person. Add to that the fact that they are busy worrying about the end of the world, and you’ll find that Gen Z is a mental hot mess. The good news is that they are very quick to seek help and are not shy about it. I think the pandemic really helped the online therapy business and there are a jillion sites to choose from. I wonder if any of them are like the automated chat sessions we have with Xfinity about our cable service? Here’s how that would go for me:

Now that I have visited a bunch of the therapy sites and have googled “urinary incontinence” to find the link above, I know what ads I will be seeing over the next few weeks. Here are just a few popular therapy sites along with their rates as posted by top10.com

betterhelp $60-$80 per week

Talkspace $65-$100 per week

ReGain $60-$80 per week

TEMPORARY TATTOOS

I won’t live long enough to develop an understanding about why people want to PERMANENTLY decorate their bodies with things they thought were cool when they were in their twenties. If I had done that, I would be sporting a “Sock it to me” tattoo on my left arm and Joe the camel on my right butt cheek. And I am 64. Try to visualize that. I worked as a nurse on a geriatric unit and was treated to the sight of many ship tattoos on the chests of 75 year old men that, shall we say, had not weathered the storm very well. After they had open heart surgery and grew man boobs the ships began to look more like the sinking Titanic than the USS New Jersey. I will never erase the memory of the 80 year old woman with a butterfly on her ass. I guess it looked different back when she was wearing bikinis than it did when I was rolling her over to put her on a bed pan.

Fortunately, there is a solution that can save our newest generation of adults from the permanent disfigurement of knuckle, full sleeve and neck tattoos - temporary tattoos. These are not like the ones you transfered to your arm with a sponge when you were 10 that wore off in 2 days, and they are not henna. These look like the real deal. According to inkbox.com, a popular maker of “tattoos for now,” they last 1-2 weeks. Application takes a few steps. The tattoo starts out faint and then “the ink reacts with the proteins and keratin in your skin, and darkens over 24-36 hours.” Wouldn’t you far rather have Emma and Olivia try out the popular Sundaze tattoo on her hand before committing to it for the rest of her life? These make great stocking stuffers but get your checkbook out. A less expensive option? You just can’t beat the Sharpie marker.

inkbox.com Tattoos for now - $20-$30

DISPOSABLE CAMERAS

I guess they aren’t just for weddings anymore? I have it on good authority (aka, my daughter Lawler) that young people like retro stuff like disposable and vintage film cameras. And I do think it would be good for them to learn about what REAL suffering feels like. That is, paying $14.99 to develop 24 pictures of people with their eyes closed when you could have taken 100 of them with your phone and automatically adjust the red eye and color balance. Or, better yet, paying $18.99 for a 36 exposure roll that contains nothing. I wonder how long it will take them to find out you can’t post those photos on Instagram. The one kind of disposable camera that I think really does make sense is the waterproof version. So that Madison can take pictures of the temporary tattoo on her ass when she’s in the pool.

Fuji Film Quick Snap Waterproof disposable camera - $43.99 for two

Polaroid 600 OneStep Auto Focus 600 Instant Camera - $139.99

DUVET COVERS

This is another one I have learned about on good authority, I just can’t remember who it was. It was someone I play golf with because I remember where we were when she told me and the discussion lasted for at least 2 fairways. It seems that young people no longer use top sheet or blankets. They only use a duvet. So if you give them sheets, they will only use the bottom one. Duvets need covers if you aren’t going to put a sheet between you and them, so there ya go. What a great example this is of the diversity in preferences of different generations. I personally loathe the duvet-only bed covers of so many hotels. I fall asleep, get hot, throw off the cover, fall asleep, get cold, pull the cover back up, then repeat. Youngsters, enjoy the duvets while you can because, before you know it, you will be ordering a cool pad for your bed instead. Everybody on the golf course talks about those but I haven’t gotten one yet.

Whatever you do, make sure the duvet cover is made of sustainable, organic fabric like this one.

Duvet Cover - from $100

GAMES

Gen Z is said to be into gaming - both electronic and analog - even more than their millennial predecessors, so I asked my son Taylor to make some recommendations in that category. Taylor, who is quite the avid gamer in spite of being a full-fledged legit grown up, gave me a Nintendo Switch last year and I use it to work out in the Nintendo Ring Fit Adventure game. It’s a blast for me but I don’t know whether Gen Z-ers would like it because you don’t sit on your ass to play it. You have to get up and run in place and do exercises. Taylor said I should recommend the newest game console, PlayStation 5 because it is the hottest thing going this Christmas, like the Cabbage Patch doll was in the 1980’s and Beanie Babies and Power Rangers were in the 1990s. Taylor was able to get his PlayStation 5 the first week they came out for just $550 but a friend of his had to pay $750 for the same system because you just can’t find them in stores. You can get a NEW PlayStation 5 Disc Console System GOD OF WAR BUNDLE on eBay for $789.99 but you had better hurry because there are only 38 left.

As far as card games go, a popular one is One Night Werewolf which I played with some young people over Thanksgiving. Suffice it to say that this is another one of the ways in which our generations differ, because most of my friends play Mahjongg, Bridge and Canasta, and I assure you this is not like any of those. It’s possible I never really understood the game because I cannot begin to explain how to play it other than to say that it involves using an app on your phone that gives you instructions that you carry out while everyone has their eyes closed. Then there is a bunch of chatting and negotiating to try to figure out who the werewolf is. See? I told you it is hard to explain, so you should just trust me on this one. The kids love it.

Another card game that is popular with Gen Z is We’re Not Really Strangers. It is described on the game’s website as, “a purpose driven card game and movement all about empowering meaningful connections.” Here are some of the examples of the cards:

What do you need right now but are not communicating?

When was the last time you felt lucky to be you?

What title would you give this chapter in your life?

Each player write a message to the other. Fold and exchange. Open only once you two have parted.

So it’s not exactly a drinking game, although I can imagine that I would have to be half in the bag to play it. I really can’t say any more about this game because I don’t want to lose the respect of the Gen Z-ers who didn’t pre-decorated-tree-shame me.

Sony PlayStation 5 - $700+

One Night Werewolf - $12

We’re Not Really Strangers - $25

JERKY

If you read my Sam’s v. Costco post you know what a thing jerky is. And if you didn’t read it, why didn’t you? I work hard on these posts and goodness knows I’m not making money from it unless you guys start clicking on all the ads for duvet covers and online therapy that you are probably seeing by now. To refresh your memory, the reason why young people eat so much jerky is because it is a low fat, high protein snack that travels well. While you could buy your favorite Gen Z-er a box of Big Mama Pickled Sausage or Hillshire Farm’s Yard-O-Beef, I wouldn’t recommend it. When searching for gifts for Gen Z, always include artisinal organic sustainable carbon neutral in the search. Do that with beef jerky and you will be taken straight to righteousfelon.com where you can order a sampler of flavors like Maryland Monroe, Fowl Capone, Nelson Mandilla and Darth Garlic. Or better yet, get them a subscription that will send a bag of Truffle-O-Bill jerky to their door every month of the year ($64.68).

Righteous Sampler Craft Jerky & Meat Sticks (12-Pack) - $49.99

MAIL ORDER FOOD

We started sending food as Christmas presents during the pandemic, back when people wore hazmat suits to go grocery shopping. Lawler is a big fan of the Milkbar Birthday Cake, from a bakery in New York City, so I have sent them to her and to Taylor in past years. You might wonder how they can make a cake travel well enough to be recognizable as a cake when it arrives but trust me, they do a really good job. At $62 plus $15 shipping for a cake that serves 8, one would hope so. It’s perfect for the self-actualized kid who has all the temporary tattoos and jerky they can handle.

If your favorite bakery isn’t prepared to ship a cake cross country, try Gold Belly. Gold Belly is sort of like Grub Hub only they use airplanes to deliver the food. At Thanksgiving, almost on a dare, I ordered a PieCaken using Gold Belly. A PieCaken is a dessert conglomeration inspired by the Turducken (a chicken inside a duck inside a turkey) that has a Pecan Pie, Pumpkin Pie and Spice Cake all layered inside a cake frosted with cinnamon buttercream and topped with apple pie filling. It was actually delicious. You can see from the photo that it arrived in very good shape. Silver cake plate not included.

Last year Lawler got Taylor and Amanda some pork buns via Gold Belly and they said they were absolutely delicious. If your loved one has a sweet tooth, you can buy 24 traditional macarons for $119.95, but maybe you recall the make your own Macaron Kit I recommended on last year’s list, and that’s only $34.00. Here are some of the Gold Belly offerings I picked for you to send to your youthful friends because they seem to check all the boxes that are important to Gen Z. All include free shipping.

Cuban Sandwich Kit for 4 - $89.95

Mochi Donuts 12 pack - $69.95

Rainbow Rice Krispie Treats 12 pack - $74.95

Joe’s Vegan Philly Cheesesteak 8 pack - $199.95

Artisan Ice Cream choose 6 pints - $99.95

Small Batch Artisan Bacon - $49.95

Okay, to be honest, I don’t really think the Small Batch Artisan Bacon is a great choice for a Gen Z-er. But it sure caught my eye.

Of course, the greatest gift we can give to our friends is peace on earth. But if that doesn’t work out, there’s always a FREE lifetime subscription to the wise, witty and insightful Youngest Sister blog. Just send their email addresses to me at youngestsisterblog@gmail.com and I will put them on my distribution list whether they like it or not.

The 2022 Gen Z Gift List