You Are Here Bathroom Photo
The older my sisters and I get, the less any of us really needs anything that she doesn’t just buy for herself, so I like to make my sisters things that money cannot buy. They might argue that I make them things that no one would actually pay money for, but in either case, the objects are priceless. Some of my creations take a little bit of talent to accomplish, but others, like today’s crafty and clever picture project, do not.
My sister Norah has a powder room that is a virtual display case of funky, quirky things. Examples include a copy of their wedding license, a newspaper clipping of a redneck wedding announcement and a photo of my brother-in-law Tom posing with Barbara Bush. Here is a gallery of just some of the contents of Norah's powder room:
So a few years ago, when Google Maps satellite images became not only ubiquitous, but of fairly high quality, I got one of my brilliant-beyond-brilliant ideas for what I thought was the perfect addition to their bathroom – a “You Are Here” sign, like you see in a shopping mall or a museum. It's a little geographic entertainment piece for the benefit of one using the toilet and instructions on how to make it follow.
CAPTURE THE IMAGE
Locate the address of the person you are going to make this for on google maps, and switch to Satellite view. Situate the property in a way that shows it well, then use Snipping Tool, or some other screen capture tool, to take a picture of it. If you have a PC, Snipping Tool is included with Windows. To find it, click the Start/Windows button on the bottom left corner of your PC and start typing “Snip.” The application name will appear. Open it and use the rectangle selection tool to grab the picture, then save it.
Use Google Maps Satellite view to capture the aerial photo of the property.
ADD THE TEXT AND POINTER
Open the snipped image in an editing tool. I use Photoshop, but you can do it in something as simple as Paint or Powerpoint. If you have a Mac, I’m sorry I can’t help you because I don’t know a thing about Macs. I owned one for about a year and it was one of the most painful experiences I have ever had – sort of like suddenly being forced to learn to write with your left hand when you are 50 years old and right-handed. But people who own Macs always seem to act superior to the Windows/PC crowd, so I’m thinking you Mac users can figure all of this out on your own.
Anyway, put a red dot on the picture and draw a line out to the caption, “You Are Here.” It is meant to look like one of those signs in the National Gallery that help you find your way out of the Etruscan art section back to the Ladies Room. Take good care to position the dot at the place in the house where the photo will hang – that’s important. I think it is most amusing when planned for a bathroom, but you could hang it anywhere.
Here’s the finished product:
I was careful to put the red dot exactly where Norah's powder room is.
THE PRESENTATION
If you have a really good printer you can print the finished product yourself on glossy paper. Otherwise, take it somewhere like Fedex office so that you get a nice print. I love that you can submit the file on line to Fedex Office, then pick it up when it's ready. Mount the picture in a decent frame and wrap it nicely. If you offer the gift in person and are able to get teary-eyed on command, do that so that the person opening it will think it is something really touching.
Mounted for appreciation by the male user.
It is important that the picture is hung in the right spot, so you might want to offer counseling in that department. Norah is a master when it comes to displaying tacky objets d'art and needed no instruction. She skillfully hung the picture so that it is at eye-level when you are sitting on the toilet, although it could be equally effective mounted at eye-level above the toilet tank, for appreciation by the male viewer. Every time I visit Norah's house and see this treasure, I am filled with pride, knowing I brought joy to the lives of the many people who use her toilet every year.
This is a gift that is sure to please that loved one on your list who has everything, including a sense of humor. It is so easy to make, you should be able to knock out a dozen of them in time for Christmas. Let me know how yours turn out in the Comments section below.